I just heard what was perhaps the most glorious answering machine message in the history of answering machine messages. While placing a call to Wisconsin to speak with a prospective student, I encountered the following after the beep:

“Allllllllllllllright. For the last time, we know that Brett Favre is playing for the Vikings. We’re over it. If you want to leave a message for (lists names of family members), feel free. If you want to leave a message about Brett Favre and the Vikings, call somebody who cares.”

And that’s when I found my soulmates. In Wisconsin. Via answering machine.